dream...

I had a dream last night that I wrote my thesis on five huge sheets of butcher paper, stapled it like a book and handed it in. The place where I handed it in was the club house of the new Yankee Stadium. I was freaking out and Andy Pettite came up to me and told me not to worry, that I was a fantastic writer and diligently doing my research and that everything would fall into place. It was a pretty amazing dream...

view from the back porch

Here was my brilliant view of Binghamton on a beautiful Friday afternoon from the back porch of Cyber Cafe West. It may look a little desolate but it truly was urban allure. My cell phone doesn't take the greatest photos...



I drank my blackberry sage tea (a kmc favorite for 13 years, dating back to java joe's days) and read interpretations of Lan Cao's Monkey Bridge, an interview with the author (in which she said..."that is why I like writing, because i think in literature, in fiction, you create your own world, and it's that own world when I meet a new person - if that person creates their own world also in a way that is compatible with mine - that is where I find the psychic connetion. The creation of one's own identity, one's own world, one's own definition. Of course, with what we carry with us. Nobody is an unencumbered person. We all come with our own inherited identity. But... I relate more to those who take that and make something else with it. It is that new world that is created from the old and new..." [Newton, 177]. gorgeous).

i also texted a bit with kamin, listened to the dead and tea leaf green and watched people come in and out of the cafe. lovely friday afternoon.

ponderings...part deux.

In this world the wise one holds onto confidence and wisdom. Those are the greatest treasures; all other riches are pushed aside. - Buddha

somethings I have gathered this evening as I have been reading...

transculturation. totally sexy and doesn't need to be defined by which generation of immigrant you are. i'm 4th generation on my maternal grandfather's side and in some ways i can still relate to transculturation in that I am "consciously recognizing and achieving a means to construct an idea or identity that is not just a by-product of two spaces or ideas" (pauline t. newton, transcultural women of the late-twentieth-century U.S. American literature, p. 6).

In my "intro to religion" class I took at Capital University my professor would possibly refer to this as our painted curtain, Newton refers to a "patchwork identity"earlier in her intro which is an interesting idea that she builds upon in this work.

... am i nerding you out yet?

consider these quotes by my ladies:

"Writing seems to me a part of being alive" Maxine Hong Kingston

"I've always written out of necessity" Sandra Cisneros

I relate to both of these statements in ways that are sewn into my heart and soul and entire being. I, too, have always written out of necessity; that necessity being that the act of writing helps me not only articulate and organize my thoughts more clearly but does something more. There have been times when I was sure that no other being could relate to what I was feeling and in order to maintain my sanity the words needed to flow. Not here and no where anyone else will ever see them publicly. Boxes of my sanity are in the attic. ;) thankfully, i may need them once this is over.

ponderings...

Name ::: Title of Text ::: ethnicity ::: Place of origin

Lan Cao ::: Monkey Bridge ::: Vietnamese ethnicity::: came to US when she was 13

Maxine Hong Kingston ::: The Woman Warrior ::: Chinese ethnicity ::: born in California

Sandra Cisneros ::: The House on Mango Street ::: Mexican ethnicity ::: born in Chicago

What does this make Lan Cao? Can she be considered in my thesis? Oh man... she's got good stuff too... she's little known and I wanted to pump her up... not that more than 3 people are going to read my thesis...but I can pretend...

...more decisions to be made...

some good news

...finally, some good news from the powers that be at SUNY cortland...

This thesis that I am writing like a mad woman and the advisement of it from 6/8-6/30 is going to count for me as a three credit independent study.

Thank you HP!

Thank you SUNY Cortland English Dept!

Thank you Dr. Reid!! (that's his awesome site)

my true feelings for my soon to be alma mater can be read through this photo:::

apropos quote

"I want to change the world through artistic pacifist means." Maxine Hong Kingston

a quote by the author who wrote The Woman Warrior I found as I am printing and collating 40 articles. Props to my Epson Stylus Photo 1280 printer! It gets AMAZING ink mileage!! ;)






ps kami the word "apropos" is for you. ;)

My Mother Was a Computer...

...this book, subtitled "digital subjects and literary texts" by N. Katherine Hayles (beautiful name!) is one I have been reading for my thesis class (also known as Introduction to Literary Theory [though not my personal introduction]).

Two thoughts I read today that I thought were of interest to both this blog and its 5 readers and my thesis:::

Connecting mythic figures with contemporary action (127)
-As do the protagonists in the three books that I am working with for my thesis. Each text has within it stories from their parental cultures that help them explore their current journey and help to bring meaning to their endeavors to create an original experience/voice/meaning for themselves.
-As I do when I summon the Brilliant Warrior Goddess
-How does this work in our everyday lives?

People who are speaking with purpose, who believe their words will accomplish something speak much differently than those who think their speech is a waste of time (131)
-What are the words of the speakers trying to accomplish?
-Why speak at all? One of the protagonists in my book didn't speak a word for a year. How does this change depending on what language you are speaking where?
-"Speaking" here I think also can extend to type or digital "words" as I am typing now. Think of the blogs you have read when someone wants to change something or say something this idea is very poignant.

Language can be a method for exploration (132)
-This is obvious for little ones, like Miss G, but continues to be as we grow. I explore daily
with new words, how to express new ideas, how to translate my feelings into language both analog and digital.
-This idea intertwines with the above idea...we explore with our language to discover how best to speak with purpose.
-Language as words as a cultural construct helps us to explore the culture...

"This is one of the most important moments in your life. Nothing will ever be the same. We might get rich. We might get killed. We might just have an adventure, or learn something. But we have changed. We are standing close to the Heraclitean fire, feeling its heat on our faces" (quoted in Hayles from Neal Stephonson's Cryptonomicon p. 442)
-I feel like I am involved in one of the most important moments in my life. That this entire quote is relevant to me and suddenly I want to commemorate the occasion. The change.
-The Heraclitean fire is an idea from Heraclitus - a presocratic Greek philosopher who said that fire is the origin of all things and that permanence is an illusion as all things are in perpetual flux.
-This idea is sexy to me in that Buddhist way that nothing is permanent. This moment,this thought, this life, this screen you're reading. Sometimes life seems "good" sometimes life seems "bad" but in the end we have this moment only now... hmm...