i heart corky

six years ago my adoration for nick and our commitment to love each other forever and ever was recognized by the state of new york and the episcopal church. It was commemorated by a kickin' party that started at the binghamton regency and lasted into the wee hours at the harry l. pub.

my adventures with nick started long before and, god willing, will continue for many years to come.

i hope that someday every couple that decides they will love each other forever and ever will get the opportunity to have their love recognized by the state of new york.

ch-ch-changes

My clothesline last week filled me with a weird amount of joy. The day brought a ton of sunshine and Z's clothes were out on the line all tiny and colorful. Our backyard neighbor yelled to me, "Looks like you've got a baby in the house" and chuckled. So true.

By the looks of the clothesline a lot has changed round these parts. The stark change has been my relationships with everyone and everything. From my relationship with Nick to my relationship with my cat, even with myself. The hardest part about this is that I am normally a "reflector" - needing large quantities of time to examine what is going on and how to digest it, to see how I fit into the latest version of my life. Right now my largest quantities of "alone time" are spent in the shower or washing dishes or trying to put together announcements or just generally catching up. It's not that I didn't expect this, you see, I just hadn't lived it yet.

That's another thing the "wait untils" - I'm not waiting until, I'm trying to live in this moment and figure THIS thing out. When the next thing comes I'll handle that but for now, I'm handling this. I'm sure I can handle anything that comes my way just as generations of women before me have handled it and generations after me will. I'm a very smart woman, you know, quite adaptable with a spectacular partner who is equally as adaptable. As Buddhism believes, everything you need is inside you just have to find ways to access it. Just give me reprieve while I acclimate myself, please.

early literacy

Zoey had about 10 minutes of alert chill time in her pack-n-play the other day so I figured she might like a book to check out. A developmentally appropriate black & white book with bold images, of course. She loved it. It totally captured her attention. I was one proud English major mama!

mama & zoey chillin' in the yard...

...under the maple tree while I read a magazine to her and we discussed how much she might need to have in her college fund in 2028. then she found her toes and our conversation turned to body part identification. Nick roto-tilled the garden. it was a nice evening.





let's see if i can add a video:

television

I'm starting to really like the early show on cbs. I get the last "shift" which when Nick isn't working is from 6-9a. When he is working (which has only been one day) it's 4-7. Each shift is defined by what is on TV, really. Remember when the M-C Lites didn't have cable? There are also two ladies on the early show one of which is a new mom and the other is pregnant. I love looking at the preggers lady and thanking god that I finally have my body back to myself.

Cheers is on from 1-4 which rocks. Cheers was awesome when I was little but it's even better as an adult. Sports Center keeps me informed on both the basketball and hockey finals which I have no interest in. haha, although I am kind of routing for the Celtics in the NBA. Probably because of some nostalgic Larry Bird notion from my past. Don't tell LW, though.

I turn the boob tube off after the early show and turn on the radio. TV is like soda, I keep saying, too much makes you feel yucky. So we listen to pandora and chat with friends. In the afternoon, though, I need a change so I turn on "MTV Hitlist" or a music ondemand channel. I confess, there is a 14 year old girl that lives deep inside of me who still loves music videos. If only Beach MTV with Dan Cortese was still on. *sigh*

here's your zoey fix for the day: (yes, that's mtv hitlist in the back)

rilke

I beg you... to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.
-Rainer Maria Rilke

this was the quote in my daily early childhood education newsletter this morning. i thought it was quite beautiful.

almost as beautiful as this:

Zoey

The moment a child is born,
the mother is also born.
She never existed before.
The woman existed, but the mother, never.
A mother is something absolutely new.
Rajneesh

I ran across this quote in March and thought it was quite a beautiful sentiment.

Zoey Mary was born on May 10, 2010 at 1:16 in the afternoon. She weighed in at 6lbs, 9oz and 19 and a quarter inches. She is strong and beautiful. These are the two sentiments I keep hearing. I love when people tell me how strong she is (really, she's a brut for 5 days old - and these nurses and techs have extensive experience with infants). Of course she is strong, I grew her.